Dango, Ramen, Mochi, and an assortment of goodies
by Angsty0-anime-fangrl
Summary: Basically its a drabble dump full of Au's, Gender benders, Canon divergences, and other stuff
1. Dango

**So basically I'm making a drabble dump for when I magically spawn ideas out of this brain of mine. I do not own anything. Nothing. Nada.**

 **It's a Modern AU! And a fem Itachi too.**

 **Reincarnation**

Itsumi knew she should've died. Yet here she was. Stuck in some little girls mind. In a world without shinobi and chakra. It appears that she is stuck sharing a mind with a newborn baby. She expected something like eternal punishment or purgatory but this? This was pure torture.

 **One**

It appears her hosts name was Ceres Fujimoto. While it was a relief that her hosts parents and elder sister all spoke her language before she died,she did not want to deal with all that baby talk thank you! She was a fucking SS rank missing nin of the Akatsuki! Not an idiotic baby with a undeveloped brain. For a mindless brat who spent most of its time blabbering nonsense in her mind while trying to read a strange new language.

 **Three**

For a drooling toddler nothing like her precious otouto Ceres was what you call intelligent. Despite only being three years old she was already speaking like a average six year old and reading books her hosts mother gave her. While she was glad her host wasn't babbling nonsensical words and actually talking to her she had to deal with her asking countless questions and begging her to play with her best friend Cookie the stuffed tiger. The talkative brat grew up and was taken to a demeaning place called preschool after her hosts mother decided that she needed to socialize more. After multiple dense as rock preschoolers immediately rejected her hosts friendship and yanked on her hair and laughed at her while insulting her definitely real friend named Itsumi that lived in her head. While Ceres may be annoying sometimes she didn't want her to grow up lonely and friendless like her old life. So she persuaded Ceres to give up control and let her deal with them. Feeling all hyped up because she had a body again she walked up to a little girl named Nicole who reminded her of Shisui and immediately started scolding the brainless pests that were trying to steal her drawing. While Ceres may have been extremely upset because of the spanking she got later she thanked her later.

 **Five**

Once Ceres grew up she was sent to a place called elementary school to learn basic numbers and letters she already taught her. Her host's mother reminded her of her father. Always demanding something and quick to discipline when upset. She may have been a former SS class nin but she couldn't stop her when she was irritated. Ceres took the punishment, cried with her later, and sometimes accidently did it again.

 **Nine**

Years five, six, seven, and eight were all the same she made friends and cried while learning more. When Ceres turned nine her mother started paying more attention to her and started teaching her more advanced math and stopped arguing with her older sister and father. She started preparing for I.Q tests and cried when she failed them. Ceres always was too weak willed after all. She was the very opposite of what she was back when she was still Itsumi. Hot tempered and weak willed. The fire to her water. Yet no matter who she was Ceres would always be her precious person.

 **13**

When Ceres turned thirteen she found Sasuke. He was drawn on a piece of paper and became a character in something called Anime but he was he was still her little brother. When Ceres went to bed that night she was the one doing the comforting instead. She watched team sevens adventures and wept, remembering all of the innocents Danzo forced her to kill to save Konoha. Ceres's father moves to Texas and later China for work and she cries some more together with her. Ceres has always loved her father more. And her mother knows it. Her mother grows more brutal and she has to repeatedly chase away the suicidal thoughts from Ceres's brain. Ceres's acts like her usual self and along with her friends develops crushes on boys that spend most of their time laughing and mocking her. Never bothering to pay attention to the popular yet quiet boy Ryan who befriends her tormentors while never joining in. While he never torments her he can be cruel and has a strange predatory grin that reminds her of Kisame so much it hurts. She considers nudging Ceres towards him but chooses to consider Ceres's feelings over her own.

 **16**

Ceres's father moves their family to China and she sinks within her own depression and fails her classes. Her mother grows more violent and when she gets too bad her father interferes and gets a divorce. Despite how violent her mother was she was still Ceres's mother, and love works strangely. Despite how strange and shark like Kisame was she still loved him. And this time Ceres doesn't cry alone. Her older sister cries with her over the phone because despite the insults about her weight and beatings over her grades Ceres's sister loves their mother too. She swims up and out of her depression and flourishes in the place where she once refused to grow. She makes friends and happily talks about her day when she goes to bed, a big difference from when she wept herself to sleep in her arms.

 **19**

Ceres later graduates and she has never been so proud in her life. She worries Ceres will grow up and discard her. But Ceres reassures he otherwise and she is content. Ceres goes to a college and meets Ryan again and befriends him and she smiles proud of how much Ceres has grown. A few months later they start to grow more intimate and at the urging of friends the two start going out. Despite their clashing personality together they show softer sides and fit together like a puzzle.

 **20**

When Ceres turns twenty she decides to tell Ryan about her. Later in the privacy of her bedroom Ceres describes her and the impact she had on her life. When Ceres looks at himworried, Itsumi gasps inside of Ceres's mind. He's baring that shark like grin and after a few seconds grins and drops the lamest fish related pickup line she ever heard. She doesn't care though. It's Kisame and that's what matters. The two smile at each other and she is happy. She hears Ceres gasp as her presence slowly disappears from her mind and from the look on Ryan's face she knows that the same thing is happening. She grieves inside but she is glad she'll be with Kisame again.


	2. Ramen

**In which I randomly pair off Naruko with random shinobi. I DON'T OWN ANYTHING. I wish I did tho.**

 **Sasuke**

Naruko never liked tomatoes. They were the color of blood and tasted horrible in Ramen. But who cares if she hated tomatoes or not? What mattered was somebody was breaking into her apartment and stealing her fresh homegrown tomatoes without her noticing! She laid traps, hired Pakkun to be her guard dog, and even put a few S ranked seals around her garden. But the unknown thief kept on breaking into her apartment and not only did the did they steal from her garden they also had the nerve to scold her about her eating habits! She didn't give a fuck about tomatoes, but insulting her ramen. Stupid duck butt was going to die. After bribing Pakkun with premium steaks she found out Sasuke was the tomato thief. Apparently he was worried about her health. So he replaced her ramen with vegetables. While it made her heart flutter at how he cared about her she was still going to break his jaw.

 **Gaara**

He had always fascinated her. They're both jinchuriki containers and grew up without love. Yet while she found people to love and protect, he slaughtered people because of his lack of love and loneliness. She could've been him had she not befriended the Sandaime Hokage and Iruka Sensei. Despite his cold nature he is kind to her and sometimes panics when her thinks nobodies watching due to all the pressure. He enjoys drinking moderate amounts of sake and eating takoyaki with friends. Despite getting irritated when she starts poking fun at his eyebrows he has a dry sense of humour. She likes to think he's like one of those candies called lollipops. Hard on the outside and soft and chewy within.

 **Kakashi**

It takes a while for her to notice she's falling. She first realizes it when some slut walks up to him and tries seducing him and she feels a angry fire in her chest. Kurama laughs inside her head and tells her she's in love with him. She denies it for a while and then thinks about it for a while and keeps on denying because it's Kakashi their talking about. Stupid perverted Bakakashi, fifteen years older Kakashi. She keeps on denying it until she feels that raging fire inside her again when she sees more woman throw their selves at him. Then he walks up to her later and ruffles her and offers to treat her to ramen and the fire inside purrs and she agrees. A few weeks later when they're walking around Konoha and chatting about life a few academy students throw a water balloon and soak her shirt. She turns around and prepares to angrily snap at the little gaki's and teach them a lesson until she see's Kakashi's normally calm and composed face turn beetroot red and she blushes and shunshins away. A few minutes later Kakashi runs up to apologize and she impulsively asks him if he wants to go to Ichiraku's as a date. He looks at her for a second and she worries that he'll reject her and think she's weird until he sighs and grabs her hand and walks with her to the memorial stone. She asks confusedly asks him why their there. Then he sits down bows and begs her father for forgiveness and then grabs her hand and they walk off.


	3. Gatorade

**In which Iida Tenya marries Mei Hatsume and they have a kid name TenTen and move to Konoha Au! I don't own My Hero Academia or Naruto. I wish. Title: Gatorade**

Iida Tenya had a problem. Not one of those what to buy Mei for her birthday problems but something much bigger on the scale of when he had to propose and forgot the ring level.

After defeating Sensei and all of his minions he had expected life to follow the same schedule as before. But after the defeat of Sensei all of the villains that were still in action either turned themselves in or went into hiding. Which mean that heroes weren't exactly needed any more.

Izuku and some of the stronger ones still were needed to rescue people from dangerous situations and to show that heroes were still needed. But everybody else had to deal with the fact they weren't exactly needed anymore

People like Mei and Ochako could get jobs like inventors and construction workers but those without any skills or hobbies were jobless. He didn't have a problem with money, generations of heroics had ensured that. His problem was the fact he was bored!

So he decided to revisit his first love, weapons. 150 years ago his ancestor a blacksmith named Iida Tetsu fell in love with a man name Tobirama Senju and later fled to Japan out of fear for her unborn child's life. She gave birth to his great grandfather and later taught him how forge swords and knives which he later put aside for heroics and started smelting again after his retirement 30 years later.

After a searching through most of Japan Mei managed to locate a portal and after packing everything and saying their goodbyes they walk throught the portal and don't look back.

After walking around for a few days they arrive at Konoha. They walk up to the gates and his jaw drops. People wearing silver metallic headbands were jumping roof from roof and were teleporting to different locations!

One of the gates guard's teleported over to him and took him to some office. He took some tests and for some reason when Mei mention his great great grandfathers name most of the ninjas in the area stopped what they were doing and started gawking at them. Ninja's were really weird.

They took them to a building called the T&I and took some blood samples and probed in their minds before letting them go. They walked to a pawn shop and sold some of his great great grandparents stuff and somehow ended up with enough money to buy a two storied house.

After three months they had finally settled in and decided to hire a genin team to help paint their babies nursery while Mei was out discussing inventions with another pregnant friend of theirs named Nera Hyuuga. Mei had tried to paint baby TenTen's and ended up blowing up the house with one of her babies again. Mei blew up stuff, and ninja's kept on gawking. Life was good. Until it wasn't.


End file.
